Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
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