The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
