Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
