BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
