you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I am one with the molecules
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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