would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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