He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
