Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
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He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
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Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
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