No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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