Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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