id be glad to
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
