Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
