brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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