Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
