i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
