We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
This house was built for laser tag.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
