i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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