so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
