How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
You smell like stripper and shame
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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