you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
