I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
