tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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