just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
