Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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