isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
