Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize