Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
You're like the curious george of whores
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
