yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
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