i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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