Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize
