You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
