Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
