i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize