her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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