Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'm going to jail i love you
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
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