well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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