dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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