There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.