Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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