do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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