I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize