But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize