so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
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Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
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Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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