areolas are like halos for boobs.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
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