dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize