But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I can't turn off my feet"
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Randomize
