Jerry, you need to find god
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
