So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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