She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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