I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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