Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
